“What time is it? Why are you awake?” asks my mother as she enters my cold, dead room. With an angry yet weak voice, she continues, “This is the last time you stay up till two in the morning. You’re going to fall asleep in class. You need to start your homework earlier.” I plead with her to at least let me finish this assignment. This exchange of words has happened countless times since my days in middle school. I’ve always liked to believe that working at night improves my concentration and increases my work pace. Personally, I feel more awake at night. My brain is flooded with ideas, which can not possibly wait for tomorrow. This might just be a weird adrenaline rush for survival.
Some people say sleeping for an average of five hours is unhealthy. I would not be able to disagree with this; but, I cannot confine myself to sleeping for eight hours at night. Nighttime is when I feel the most comfortable. Instead of feeling lonely, I end up feeling freedom. There is no one else awake but me and I could conquer the world. The only sounds come from the AC condenser units outside, my ceiling fan, and the refrigerator. I normally have my headphones in, so I don’t even have to hear any of those low rhythmic hums with scratchy annoying ticks. During the daytime, those sounds would probably bother me.
“For many, alone time is a great opportunity for self-reflection and self-discovery,” says Psychentral.com. My favorite way to self-reflect is through journaling. Years ago, I was inspired by bullet journals on Pinterest to write a highlight or summary of my day. I could give you a summary of what I did on March 10, 2021. Looking back and looking inward has helped me learn about myself. This sounds weird, but honestly, facing yourself can help you realize your true motivations and distinguish how the choices you’ve been making are truly affecting you. It is easy to become passive about everything and lose yourself in a spiral of worries you’ve strung yourself to.
Researchers have shown that gratitude has a negative correlation with loneliness, meaning that the more you feel and express gratitude, the less likely you’ll be to experience feelings of loneliness. It is extremely important during this period in life to express your emotions. It doesn’t even have to be to a person, it could be through art or writing, which I think is more fun.
In the 1920s, psychoanalyst Carl Jung described two extremes on a spectrum of personalities: extroverts and introverts. He found that while extroverts get their energy from the energies of other people, introverts get their energy from themselves. Being that I lean towards the introverted side, there is enjoyment in the loneliest part of the day.
Of course, staying up late has its negative effects. Sleep deprivation in teenagers has been studied a lot in recent years. Some of the data collected has been used to argue that it is in the biology of teenagers to want to sleep at a later time. “Their internal sleep clock shifts to a later bedtime during the teen years. The body releases the sleep hormone melatonin later than usual at night in teens than in kids and adults,” said kidshealth.org.
There is this constant feeling amongst nearly everyone I know that we’re falling behind. One is always told that the best way to combat this feeling is through time management. But there just aren’t enough hours in the day to squeeze in everything you want to do. So, selfishly I choose to spend my nights working on something I have a fixation on doing. I could be journaling, working on some homework, or lost in my thoughts – the night is a void of opportunity.
